So I had a meeting yesterday with a residential client reviewing a landscape design I have been working on for the last couple of weeks. This will be the second revision, and hopefully the last. Previously I had dealt with the wife only and her general contractor occasionally. At this meeting, her husband was to be in attendance, and as I had heard through the grapevine – he was a demanding customer.
It was a cold morning with an on and off drizzle. Fall is coming, but of course in Colorado – Fall lasts for 2 weeks and then skips on into Winter. As I pull up to the job trailer, I realize that no one is even there, after insisting an 8 am meeting! I was in a huff! But as soon as I worked myself up, the husband and wife arrived, and my face returned to it’s natural shade. I was like one of those puffer fish – except no prickles, cause I’m so sweet. Aaaahhh…..
Hemingway, I go into my shtick and explain to them what was in their design. The husband kept asking non pertinent questions, but I maneuvered around them flawlessly. He even once stopped the conversation completely to have some silent eye combat with his wife. I had no idea what the problem was, but I hate being in the middle of a couple when they are giving each other the stink eye. I would just rather them ask me if I would make like a tree and get outta there for a bit. None of that dagger eyes crap!!! After a couple of those awkward moments, the husband wanted to walk the property and get my opinion on some things.
I felt good. I felt like the husband liked my design, had confidence in me, and wanted to get my ‘professional’ opinion on the construction of his house! I beamed! We walked all around his house in muddy, wet conditions – for it had started drizzling steadily. I was a trooper! I seriously was excited to see where this meeting was going. I had thought at first that I was just going to design, but after selling my companies ability to install, I thought I had him in the bag. He even invited me into the house to show me what the interior would be like. We were getting along like peas and carrots.
And then he abruptly left. I don’t know what it was, but suddenly he needed to be OUT of my company it seemed. I was puzzled, disappointed, and thought it was just a little rude. Here I was walking through the mud in my dress shoes getting my hair frizzed to oblivion, and this guy just leaves? I smoothed my jacket down in fuming injustice.
And then I noticed my zipper was down.
I was walking around the WHOLE time with my friggin’ zipper down. Now I know why he and his wife were making eye daggers! I bet she wanted to tell me and he said not to worry about it! I was crawling in the mud and I’m sure he noticed my inability to zip up my pants. I’m sure he couldn’t take it anymore and he finally just had to bolt! He was probably staring at my blue and yellow purley visible undies from inside my jeans THE WHOLE TIME!!!! Yuck!!!
Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the WHOLE time – but pretty damn close.
Let’s just say, ‘smooth move ex-lax!’