Tuesday, December 21, 2004

dance _____ dance the night away

so i took this quiz online. it was really hard! of course i emailed it to everyone, but little did they know, it took me 3 days to finish it!

so it's all about knowing all these 80's lyrics. It takes a long time just to get through it, and it also makes your eyes bleed. Well, more your brain. Trust me. Now, for some of you out there, it won't be difficult at all.

But is was hard for me so back off!

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

my new phone

Okay, so my new work phone sucks ass. The phone is so huge, it looks like one of those cell phones from the 80's. i think there are little elves living inside it that peddle the gears every time i want to make a phone call. Hooray for Nextel.
i tried to hyperlink a picture of my phone, but for some reason it won't let me. You'll just have to agree that the Nextel i58sr is an ugly ass yellow phone. that's right, they ordered it in yellow! WHY??????
Who even likes yellow? Oh! It's the people that buy yellow cars. Why? Because they are insecure, and need attention. Red is out people! Yellow is the new "it" color! I hate yellow cars! Especially those weird Subaru's that are the new version of the El Camino. The half car half truck. When were those EVER a good idea? Even the Ford Falcon hybrid thing is gross. The only thing it's got going for it, is that it's from the 60's and was never made again. But then someone has to go and try to build the hybrid car in the 70's. IT SUCKED!!! It seemed we skipped 1 decade (don't forget the Brat in the 80's) before some young punk decided that since no 90's model was made, 2000 seemed a good time to "invent" the hip hybrid for those trendy yuppie outdoorsy types. So then they make the ugliest car ever, and paint it yellow.
Is that a breeder baby carriage they are putting in the back, or is it some trendy xtreme sport equiptment that fits their "BAJA" lifestyle? I can't tell.
Yeah. I really don't like my yellow phone.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

second time around

Everyone knows that re-heated food never tastes as good as when it's fresh (except green bean caserole, which just keeps getting better). But fast food is the worst. i actually believe that the more you heat it up, the faster the impurities grow. An example of this, is this kid bought some McD's. He was working retail so he had to help some customers before he could finish his lunch. He ended up heating it up 3 times before he got to eat it. The enevitable happend, and he got sick! I blame it on the re-heating process. Those micro-waves will get ya! They will infect your mind!!! Then it moves on through your body, infusing with your heatly tissue....

Whew! Kinda got psycho there for a minute. Actually, the whole reason i brought up the microwaving fast food issue, was because i went to Long John Silver's yesterday. I tried to play it all cool with my co-worker, by saying that i really wasn't a big fan of the fish eatery. i actually hadn't eaten there since i was a kid. But lo and behold- i ordered a fish and chicken combo, and it was like eating heaven! Pure, delectible, greasy beyond belief, heaven. I couldn't eat my entire meal, so i saved it for today.
i kept thinking about the golden crispy batter, the moist chicken awaiting me inside it's grease dipped coat. So i had to eat it for breakfast.

And it was good.

Except for the hush puppies. They sucked ass.
So, the point of this whole thing: Don't re-heat hush puppies. There is no point in saving them. Do yourself and the hush puppies a favor, and eat them fresh. i know you want to save a little somethin' somethin' for later - but trust me on this one.

Friday, November 05, 2004

bored beyond belief

Why is it that every Friday around 3:00, time stands still?

Does it have anything to do with the upcoming weekend? Maybe. Does it have anything to do with being bored at work? Maybe. Could it possibly be that you are so sick of being around work people, you just want to go home an be with your real family (the staff of Planet Express)? Maybe. Or maybe it's just that Friday afternoons, are like Monday mornings. Sure there is stuff for you to do at work. Most times, you really need to finish it by the end of the day. As on Monday's, when you come into work and have to restart your routine. It takes a while to get productive, but when you finally do it, it takes you on a 4.5 day ride, that seems to end at Friday at 3:00pm.

To answer my earlier questions, i don't know why this Friday is creeping by. I have no interresting plans for the weekend, I've got plenty of challenging work to do - so i'm not bored, and finally, i don't really work around people, so i can't say i would like to hang out with my other friends.
It's a pickle. That's for sure.
Whew. i gotta think of something better to write about......

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

An Interlude at Racine's

So i was at this restaurant on Sunday with my roller derby leauge for our monthly meeting. My leauge is made up of a myriad of ladies, varying from age 21 to 36. So when the bus boy came around filling our water glasses, a sudden gasp from all members echoed around the table. This was no bus boy. This was an Adonis. He couldn't have been more than 20 years old, if not a little younger. An age of sexual peak. A body to die for, including veins popping out on top of his forearm muscles. Tattoos popping out just above his elbow, where his rolled up sleeves rested. Whew. This man was beautiful, and he knew it. He also knew that the entire table of roller girls thought he was a hottie as well.

So of course there was immediate chatter betwix the women about how we could gain the attention of this sexual fantasy. I don't know how, but i somehow assumed the name of "Mrs. Robinson", and it was left up to me to propell myself (and in doing so, the whole team) into this man's awareness.
"Throw a Pickle!" said GiGi the Assasin.
"No! Here's a creamer! You should drop it!" said Ivana Killeau.
"Here! Use my coffee cup, and ask for more!" said Rolanda Yu.

As the women of my derby team whispered "audible" frantic suggestions, all I could do was stare at this man. The dark hair and brown eyes seemed to hold my gaze, it somehow transfixed me.....until I realized I was staring. I then realized that he realized i was staring. I turned my face downwards and put my nose toward my minutes i was recording for the meeting. Sighs of disappointment escaped through mouths that were closest to me.

Time went by, glances were stolen. I could not concentrate! I knew there was no way i was ever going to see this man again, but for that very same reason, i could not look away! It was starting to make me frustrated! So finally, i resolved not to look at him, no matter how close he came to our table.

Well, I've never been much for resolutions, so when i had finished my dinner, i was looking at a leauge member who was talking, trying to write down what she said as fast as i could in my notebook. I suddenly heard a deep, soft voice over my right shoulder.
"Would you like a box, miss?"
I turned around and found myself gazing into his face. As i whipped my head back around, afraid he would see me blushing, i said the only thing i could think of:
"Uh, yes please."

I AM RETARDED!!!! I can't even look an 18 year old in the face!!! My shoulders slumped as soon as he was gone, as i stared at a blank piece of white paper.
"Cassie, could you repeat what La Vicious just said?"
I looked up, and every girl's face was aimed at my confusion.
"Uhhh....I missed it." the girls looked at me like i was crazy. Some secretary i was....but i had to redeem myself!
"I couldn't help it!" i protested, "He was talking to me!"
The whole table grew excited. "what did he say to you!!" 17 girls exclaimed at once. "tell us! Tell US!!!"
"He.....He....", I faltered, "He...asked me if i wanted a box for my food!"

That did not redeem me. What did redeem my stupidity was that when he brought my box of food back to me (which may i note that he did NOT wrap anyone else's food up for them - they just got handed boxes) he placed the box infront of me, putting it down over my right shoulder. But this time, his left hand, ever so slightly, touched the back of my left shoulder. I got butterflies immediately!!! I squirmed in my seat after he left, and the women surrounding me made noises and comments of excitement and jealousy (or so I perceived).

We ended up leaving about a half hour later, upon which i only saw him a few times after that. i felt like leaving a note, "forgetting" something so i would have to go back to the table as he was bussing it, SOMETHING!!! But i did none of those things. I simply said, "Have a good night," and looked into his eyes. He was so bold to stare right back at me and say, "You do the same, miss", while following me with his eyes right out the door. My teammates were talking to me, over me, around me, about how i should've gotten his number, said more to him, made myself more availiable, but i didn't hear them.

I left with the memory that this young, hot, sexual Adonis (who was well out of my league) had been flirting with me. ME! Mrs. Robinson. It is a good memory to have, and an awesome story to tell!

I RULE!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, October 21, 2004

the cassie supremacy

Can this be real? I mean, who would want to be a bar code for the medical industry! YIKES!!


I don't know about other people, but i just don't like the idea of letting the government rule my destiny, by implanting capsules in my body, that they are sure to fuck up.

Monday, October 18, 2004

roller mania

So my roller derby team got our pictures taken for the November issue of 5280. i didn't even know anyone read that magazine. Plus i really don't think the the people that do read that magazine, would be interrested in roller derby. All that magazine ever has is articles about restaurants, and where to hang out in LODO.

Well, here is the link to the Westword article back in August. I will link the 5280 article when it comes out, if i can.


i think Mistress Mayhem is permanent.


my mom is awesome

The truth comes out! Part Deux of the "historical novel":

Well, I am all through the book. The main character "Jacob" who was really James Marinovich has me woven throughout the book. Two parts are kind of...well kind of... well here is the part right after the first section I wrote...

But her hair, her long frizzy hair did indeed excite Jacob. Year's later, leafing through a coffee table book, Magritte, he would be reminded of the first time he saw Mary's hair. he would feel a nostalgic ache while gazing upon pubic hair curling around a face that had breast for eyes and vagina for mouth.

OK, you know me, that kind of freaked me out!!!

I told her i didn't really know what to think if someone compared my hairdo to pubic hair!!

my mom is cool

so, my mom sent me this email.

Do you remember when I told you one of my old hippie friends wrote a song about me called "Mary in the Morning." Well now I have been imortalized in a novel. Another old hippie friend wrote a "historical novel" called "The Psychedelic Symphony," by James Marinovich. On page 3 I am introduced:

Where did she come from?
She had long curly light brown hair that fell in bristles rather than waves.
A cascade of hair that, in its radical frizziness might have well have jolted the vanity of a young woman from some earlier era. But in the summer of 1968, with Janis Joplin a figurehead of the earthy chic, she appeared eminently fashionable.
In any event, she had never been vain - the self confidence she exuded was not self-absorption; she simply liked life and she liked herself, and it showed, that's all.

My mom is so cool. She didn't send me the part where he mentions her name, although she says he didn't change it to hide her identity. This leads me to believe that maybe there's some secret stuff she doesn't want me to know about...historical novel my butt!!!
And when the hell did someone write a song about you? Who are you? I want my mom back! Not some hippie goddess that boys were falling over! GROSS!!!!
(she's still pretty cool, even if it forces me to realize that my mom was alive before she met my dad!)

Friday, October 15, 2004

virgin blog

This is my first post. i have nothing interresting to say due to the fact that i am at work, and sneaking onto the internet. I just want to see what this looks like, and i realize that no one will probably ever read this! Wi-Hooo!