Wednesday, February 14, 2007


So I wanted to discuss some scenarios that are regularly debated at my house.

1. Death Star vs. Borg Ship
stipulation: what if beaming weren't allowed?

* this is not my artwork - i found it....

2. Gandalf vs. Dumbledore

3. Sauron vs. The Empire

4. Darth Vader vs. Picard
stipulation: the force may be used - but only as in Star Wars Episodes 4-6 (not earlier ones)

5. General Moff Tarkin vs. Mr. Burns

I think the last one is pretty funny.
I had no idea until writing this post that there were chat rooms FULL of discussing these scenarios! I thought it was just my house after drunk night! ha!


Josh said...

I really like the image for #1.

Josh said...

Picard would definitely kick Vaders butt. Vader is all falling apart. Other then the force, he's got nothin. I mean, check out Picards moves on that clip, no question.

Paul said...

We must not forget that the Death Star harbors scads of TIE fighters within its bowels that could be used against the Borg Cube. I think the question then becomes, how many Cubes would be needed to defeat the Death Star and its fleets of TIE fighters.

jason said...

okay, let me address them all. The first one is the hardest. I'm going to have to say the Death Star. Here's why: the borg ship can rapidly evolve, so that it gets damaged by the first hit or two, but then is able to shield 100% against the same attack. The Death Star only needs one shot with the ray to totally destroy the cube. If that couldn't be used, then my vote goes to the Borg. As they say "resistance is futile". 2. Dumbledore....hands down, no doubt 1000 times better than Gandalf. Not only does he have a cool personality, he is way more clever and broad in his magical abilities. Honestly, what the hell can Gandalf do? I mean, besides take wayward hobbits under his "care". He's a pervo. 3. I'm going to have to go with The Empire...I mean, come on....they have space travel, Sauron has orcs that ride wilderbeasts. 4. Again, no contest. While I like Picard, Darth Vader would instantly kick his ass with a force choke. 5. I'm going to have to go with Mr. Burns on this long as he has Smithers to prop him up during the fight. Never underestimate an old bastard with a heart of coal.

Yeah, I'm a geek.

Denny said...

As far as the Deathstar versus the Borg cube I think that you guys have is right if there were only one Borg Cube there is no argument.

Ok now as far as Gandolf and Dumledore using Jason's logic that Gandolf may have questionable motives with the Hobbits, what about Dumbeldore roaming around in the middle of the night keeping an eye on all the kids at Hogwarts I think I find them both disturbing and I think it a coin toss.

As far as Sauron vs. the Empire there are magical and mystical forces at work with both,however the force has technology in its arsenal too.

Next we have Vader and Picard. Now this is tough for me because of my complete awe of Jean-Luc Picard. If you look at this from just a man to man fight of brawn and brains I think I would have to give it to Picard just because of his great mind and decision making abilities. And not to mention the fact that they are or were both cyborgs at one time or another so that may even things up a bit. Now with that said we have to throw in that pesky thing known as the Force. Now that changes everything in Vader's favor. Also, the light saber could quite possibly be the coolest weapon ever which is a whole other debate. So, under protest this one goes to Vader. Now, what about Patrick Stewarts speaking ability vs. James Earl Jones ? See if we look at the total sum of all parts here this might be a fair fight after all. Or am I just reaching here because I'm partial to Jean-Luc ?

Lastly, Tarkin and Burns. I thought about this one for a while. They are both very vile and evil men. Now I have a question for you : Assuming that The actual Star Wars Happened a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away is it possible that the general maybe didn't die like we all thought and maybe escaped. Now since "Mr. Burns was born on September 15, but the year of his birth is uncertain*. It has fluctuated during the course of the show", I know it's a stretch but stay with me people-Could they be the same person ? He has also appears as a vampire in a Halloween episode, so The good general somehow lived escaped to earth, bitten by the undead and has lived on to become burns. Voila ! Seems reasonable enough right, Now if I'm completely off base here and have somehow over thought this I have to give it to Burns just for general priciple. He's just a bad bad man.

*Montgomery Burns-Wikipedia

This and That said...

I was traumatized as a sophomore in high school because my senior boyfriend wanted to stay home all day and night and have us watch the Star Trek marathon instead of go to Prom. So no comment.

S E E Quine said...

` Where the heck did the Picard V.s Vader video come from?

` It's sad just how interesting these topics can be.....