Friday, December 01, 2006

FSM Anyone?

TOPEKA, KS—In response to a Nov. 7 referendum, Kansas lawmakers passed emergency legislation outlawing evolution, the highly controversial process responsible for the development and diversity of species and the continued survival of all life.

"From now on, the streets, forests, plains, and rivers of Kansas will be safe from the godless practice of evolution, and species will be able to procreate without deviating from God's intended design," said Bob Bethell, a member of the state House of Representatives. "This is about protecting the integrity of all creation."
The sweeping new law prohibits all living beings within state borders from being born with random genetic mutations that could make them better suited to evade predators, secure a mate, or, adapt to a changing environment. In addition, it bars any sexual reproduction, battles for survival, or instances of pure happenstance that might lead, after several generations, to a more well-adapted species or subspecies



Anonymous said...

` Aaaa haaaa haaaa haaaaaaaa!!!! Well, after the insects are all dead, just think of all the rotting garbage everywhere!

` Hey, does this law also apply to reverse evolution? If so, Lou Ryan is in big trouble! (And I may be, as well, for being his gay lover....)

Paul said...

HAHAHAHA!!!! This might actually improve Kansas.

Anonymous said...

Those wacky Kansans.