Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Seinfeldian Episode 1

We open with Jeff and Casey sitting in a movie theatre awaiting the film. Jeff just gets off the phone with his brother from NYC.

“So what did your brother have to say?” Casey asks popping kernels of fresh, buttery movie popcorn into her mouth.

“Well my brother asked if our relationship was okay. Apparently my parents saw you at TGIF on Friday after work,” replied Jeff, a little bemused.

“Oh really? Why didn’t they come say hello?” Casey said, chomping away.

Jeff grabs a handful of popcorn as well, “Well, my dad wanted to, but my mom wouldn’t let him.”

Casey looks around the bag for an extra buttery piece. “Why not? And why did he ask if we were doing okay?”

“Well, my mom said you were sitting with a group of people, mostly couples and talking to a guy for a really long time.” He said as he wiped his finger on a napkin.

At this point, Casey stops in mid toss of a kernel of popcorn and looks at Jeff. “Did you tell her when you were at their house today for Father’s Day - that I was at a going away party for some guy from my work?”

“They didn’t say anything to me,” he said honestly incredulous.

“Not even when you told them I couldn’t come today because I was feeling sick? It would’ve been a perfect opportunity!” she said, exasperated.

“Nope. Not a word. Apparently my mom decided to call my brother, Joe in NYC instead.” He proceeded to eat a handful of the corn.

Casey crinkled her nose and said, “How weird!” She resumed digging away at the bag.

“He (Joe) also asked me about you going up to Fort Collins by yourself and spending the weekend with some guy,” he said nonchalantly.

Casey stopped again. “You mean Eli? My best friend since college whom they’ve met and is self proclaimed “Gayer than Christmas”?” This time, she set the bag on the floor and turned to face Jeff. The theatre was filling up and the movie was about to begin. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“That’s the one. I guess they overheard me calling Eli that weekend when you were taking a nap. I told them you went hiking all day with one of your old school chums, but they still thought it was weird that you were sleeping over at some guys’ house. Even AFTER I told them he was gay.
I’ve never seen this side of them. It’s pretty funny when you think about it!” He laughed a little as the lights went out and the previews came on.

Casey turned back in her seat, slumping and crossing her arms. “Hmm….not very funny to me. They must think I’m a floozy!” The movie begins….

7 comments:

Blackpetunia said...

Damn, I think they are all a bit nosey and it sounds like they are passing judgements that aren't theirs to pass. That would piss me off to no end! What the hell, don't they have enough life to keep them out of spying on you all the time??

Ted said...

Jeff and Casey?

Hows about "Jack" and "Crissy"? And his parents could be the Ropers.

Can I be Mr. Furley? That guy's shirt-and-medalion combos were the bee's knees.

Anonymous said...

I love the term "Seinfeldian." I think we should define. Or maybe find out if it has a definition already. Anyhow, you should also right about your Seinfeldian work experiences!

2 Dollar Productions said...

Good visual, and the more Seinfeldian scenarios the better since the demise of that series.

This and That said...

I just spent a whole weekend in the mountains with over 40 gay men and it made my husband happy! Maybe we should examine that one. But seriously, I think it is funny they are so concerned.

Aaron said...

I don't get it.

locomocos said...

i think it's pretty funny, too.

i'm just glad i left early and only had 3 beers. Usually when i go out with my co-workers, i get SLOSHED!

case in point - i guess an hour or so after i left, the entire crew got cut off and kicked out!

Who says landscapers don't know how to have a good time!!!!!