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No no. You might be thinking that I’m talking about what makes a good family comedy other than a chimpanzee – sadly, no. I’m talking about bringing babies to movies.
Last night I went to go see Underworld Part Deux. This will NOT be a movie review –so don’t worry. This movie was too average to have a review other than the fact that I thought it was NOT a family film. But apparently those in the audience of the 5:30 matinee at the United Artists Denver Pavilions did not share the same view.
My opinion why this movie was not suitable for children under 8 – which all kids present were well under 8 years old:
1. It was rated R
2. There were tons of people getting killed either by sucking of blood, decapitation, guns, and the ripping of jaws off (which is why I’m convinced it got the rating of R)
3. There was a hot sex scene which showed pretty much everything except parts. Let’s just say – it didn’t leave much for interpretation (this MIGHT be covered in the R rating, but I’ll have to check)
4. The language was proper for an R rated movie, meaning that there were a lot of f-bombs
5. Excessive use of titties and blood. Now, I know I covered this above, but I would like to add that there were titties, blood, people turning into werewolves and people eating other people. Why do I mention this again? Cause this is what makes a good horror movies. I know I know, “But Cassie, you love zombies, dammit!” Tis true. But I also love horror movies as a whole, and this had a whole lotta horror – which could possibly be a reason why it was deemed a rating of “Not suitable for Children without Parent Supervision”.
So if I might sum up:
This movie was not acceptable for children who are still grappling with the concept of ‘is this movie real’ and ‘Dad, what is trick photography’ (heh heh heh – I love that term). I just don’t think the Rating System really had in mind that you could bring babies to the theatres who were crying the whole time because they were so freaked out by a scary movie. Are we TRYING to raise sociopaths?
Okay, so that MIGHT be a little over the top –
But am I crazy here?
I remember babysitting when I was 13 years old going to see Ghostbusters 2 – and all 4 of my young charges were scared shitless at Vigo popping out of that painting! We unfortunately had to leave the theatre (which, at the time sucked cause I thought that was a GREAT movie) because they were so scared!
So why would someone take kids who were around the same age to a terrible film like Underworld 2?
I understand if people can’t get a sitter – but if you have to bring your kids along to a movie, why not go to a kids movie? Or even a comedy or PG love story? And why weren’t they taking their kids OUT of the theatre when they started crying? Cause they didn’t want to miss out when that vampire got blown to smithereens when the bomb detonated? Geez!!!!
I think they need to start making signs to follow “Please turn off your cell phones” that say “if you were dumb enough to bring your baby to this rated R film, please take him out of the theatre when he starts crying so he’ll only have nightmares for 1 week, instead of 3!”
I some of you have kids, nieces and nephews. Would you take your children to these types of movies when they were that young? Or even now? What do you think about this new trend? Do you think there is some validity to the belief that violence on the TV and movies leads to maladjusted adults? Could we be contributing by allowing our kids to see these movies before they are mature enough? SOMEONE GIVE ME THE ANSWER!!!!!