Gluttony

Sinopsis
What it is: Gluttony is an inordinate desire to consume more than that which one requires.
Why you do it: Because you were weaned improperly as an infant.
Your punishment in Hell will be: You'll be force-fed rats, toads, and snakes.
Associated symbols & suchlike: Gluttony is linked with the pig and the color orange.


Yes. America is indeed, Glutinous.

My holiday weekend consisted of going to Josh’s parents’ house and my own “family’s” gathering, at Ed’s in FOCO.
2 THANKSGIVINGS!!! I ATE SO MUCH FOOD!!!!

It started out on Thursday by me making a green bean casserole for the green bean deficient Thanksgiving meal at Josh’s parent’s house. Unfortunately, his cousin showed up with the same side dish.
Why did I even ASK his mom what I should bring, if it was a free-for-all to begin with? I mean, I about fell over when I found out GBC wasn’t going to be at the table, but I really wanted to try out this pumpkin soup recipe I saw on The Food Network. If I had know that EVERYONE wanted to bring GBC, I would’ve done that instead.
BUT ALAS.
Even though his cousin’s dish was in a pretty dish, and LOOKED similar to mine – OF COURSE – mine was better. I mean, who likes soupy GBC? She had added extra milk, cream of CHICKEN, and I think she even said butter.
Mine was just like it said in the directions, except I take out the milk and add my SECRET INGREDIENT: EXTRA French Fried Onions.

I know. Crazy, huh? I really go all out –

Which is why I was so bummed that they didn’t pass MY dish around. But then I realized, the less people eat MY dish, the more leftovers we have at home! HOORAY!!! The dish itself sat on a side table behind Josh, and next to his parents – so it only makes sense that his mom and dad were the only people to partake in all of GBC fresh, crunchy glory. Bless his dad’s heart, he even got seconds!
But if you noticed that I didn’t mention Josh eating it – you were correct.
He did not eat ANY of his girlfriend’s dish at his family’s dinner.

Am I loco here? As my mom said, isn’t that in Boyfriend Rules 101? You ALWAYS eat your girlfriend’s dish and then exclaim, “That was the BEST GBC in the WHOLE WORLD!!!!” – right?

Well, it didn’t happen for me on my first Thanksgiving with Josh. Apparently after repeatedly asking him to try it, he informed me that he was too full eating everyone else’s dishes.

I guess he made up for it by accompanying me to Ed’s house for Thanksgiving on Saturday, where we met the most wonderful grandma in the world: Ed’s smoking, cussing, and drinking granny. She was wonderful. She was so funny and didn’t know what was going on half of the time. I just loved her. Ed’s family always makes me feel good about my own family. I just mean that I feel glad that I’m not the only one who has ‘interesting’ family members – if you know what I mean. I won’t go into it, but a proper mother and father, drunk granny, gay son, fundamentalist Christian son and daughter-in-law, and a crazy 8 year old who throws insane temper tantrums makes me feel like I fit in just fine.

Ahh…..
I can’t wait for Christmas!